Getting Back To Family

This year has been kind of tumultuous in terms of my personal and family lives... one year from yesterday my uncle Robert died, and then at the end of May my grandmother died, and I don't really feel like getting into what's gone on for me personally. But family wise, things have been absolutely crazy. We've had falling out after falling in after falling out with various family members, and now finally things seem to be settling down for better or worse.

Today I had a really nice visit with my cousin Samantha. It's something Robert had wanted and something I've really wanted, too. But you know how life is-- things get in the way, you become busy and then there are a million and one excuses that you make in order to avoid what you really know you should be doing. So that's how it went. For the last six or eight years my uncle had been asking me to call Sam, spend some time with her, go out to lunch with her, go see a movie with her-- anything, as long as we were visiting and spending the cousin-time together that she and I and he desperately wanted us to share. But I never did... I always told him that yeah, yeah, I'd call her, or that at the moment I just had too many things going on... so we never hung out except for Thanksgiving and the rare lovely-but-brief run-in's my grandmother made possible. And then they both died.

Strange as it sounds, we had some really nice visits during the days immediately after her dad's death and the death of our grandmother. But it wasn't really a visit, you know? And then life had to resume some of its normalcy... Sam moved to New Hampshire and I started my job, and chances for a visit went from slim to almost none...

Until this week. I've been getting good at doing things more spontaneously, I've noticed. And I had plans for today, but I also knew that Sam was in town and would be leaving before the next time I had off from work. So I jumped on it and asked her to meet me for coffee. What a positive experience that was! We spent a couple of hours just chatting and laughing, telling stories and spending that much-needed cousin-time Robert had always wanted for us.

I don't know if it's the deaths of my uncle and grandmother that have made me think more about getting back to my family, or if it's just maybe a sign that I'm starting to grow up a bit more and realize what my priorities should be. But whatever the reason, I'm glad I'm on the right path, and I can only hope that this trend continues and that there'll be a lot more cousin-time in the future.