Dichotomy Revisited

I love the way things work out sometimes... like right now, how I decide that I want to be slightly healthier. So, in my quest for a more sustainable personal fitness level, I go out and purchase a pedometer, a new pair of running shoes, and a high quality bathroom scale. Granted the kicks and the pedometer are also serving the dual purpose of supporting my feet as I pound the floors running up and down the halls in the hospital and in keeping track of just how much pounding I actually do during a shift. But, the scale was bought with the main idea that I'd like to know how much I weigh accurately and consistently as I journey along towards becoming a healthier me.

That being said, I find it amazing that immediately after making the above purchases tonight, I stopped at the grocery store and purchased soy ice cream sandwiches, egg-free/dairy-free frozen dinner rolls and a big bag of Jelly Bellies, without even the blink of an eye.

It wasn't even until I'd gotten back into my car to drive home that I realized what I'd just done. And what was it that I had just done, you might ask? In my opinion, I had just played out a scene that most Americans are guilty of on a daily basis-- eating fat but thinking skinny.

I mean, come on, as much as I'd *like* to be healthier and more in shape, and as much as I *think* about building up physical fitness, I also think about the kinds of fats and carbohydrates that would taste the best as I sit on my rotund rump, kicking back with The Goonies.

But simply thinking and liking just don't cut it. So now, as I sit with all of my purchases spread out around me, I wonder what my next step will be-- bump up the activity level and become the healthier me I want to be, or chow down and become the digestively-satisfied me my tastebuds want me to be.

Sigh. Why can't life's decisions ever be easy?